I’m going to continue to make a Point of asking how things are going for you. And when I do, I want you to turn around and ask yourself these same questions. It’s a sure way to take stock of where you are in life—both in and out of the office—so you can realize where you’re succeeding and where you need to buckle down.

We’ve followed this line of questioning for the past few weeks now. And we’ve based our questions on the whole-life approach that we use in our coaching program—The 7 F’s of True Success. I’m talking about the Fundamentals of work, Finances (and creating your financial legacy), Family (and friends), Faith, Fitness (emotional and physical), Fun and the Fusion of these things.

We started this series of Points by talking about the importance of having someone who is sincerely interested in your answer to the question, “How are you doing?” Then we looked at what can Fundamentally help you—or hurt you—at work. Last week, I asked you, “How are you doing Financially?”

To review any of these questions (and some helpful answers), go to www.corsini.com and click on Resources to access our e-newsletter archives.

Let’s continue to ask how you’re doing when it comes to Family (and friends). “So, how’s your family? How are y’all gettin’ along?”

Now, I know a lot of people for whom family feels like, well, a soap opera. Others might have siblings they don’t get along with or parents who drive them crazy. Some people have children or other family members who are good candidates for a messed-up reality show or, heaven forbid, The Jerry Springer Show. (These people have to come from somewhere.)

But here’s the thing: We don’t get to choose many of our family members. Certainly, you have a choice when it comes to a family you create through marriage and having children. Also, many of us purposefully create a sense of family with close friends. But so many of our family relationships are simply out of our control. And yes, family can, and sometimes does, drive us crazy.

After 50 years of life, I’ve come to an important realization: It’s not so much what family members do that drives me crazy, it’s how I react to their actions that matters. We are all here for a short period of time. God demands that we love one another. He’s not letting us be selective about that either. So you’re got a spiteful Aunt Ellen? Show her some kindness. Uncle Bob drives you slap up a wall? Learn to react to what he does with a sense of peace or, better yet, a sense of humor.

Last week, we mentioned that Parade magazine did a feature titled “10 Ways to Get Rich: Warren Buffett’s Secrets That Can Work for You.” The richest man in the world shared something a bit unexpected. His No. 10 tip cautioned readers not to measure success in dollars. He said, “I know people who have a lot of money, and they get testimonial dinners and hospital wings named after them. But the truth is that nobody in the world loves them. When you get to my age, you’ll measure your success in life by how many of the people you want to have love you actually do love you. That’s the ultimate test of how you’ve lived your life.”


Family can be a blessing or a curse. Ultimately, though, it’s all in how you look at it. Unlike so many other things in our lives, we don’t get to choose all of our family. For better or for worse, they are ours, and we are theirs. I challenge and encourage you to make family a blessing in your life. Remember, it’s not what people do to you that matters, its how you relate to what they do.